Happiness? Found it.

I always said I was going to be 100% honest when it came to sharing my life through these blog posts in hope that I can connect with my audience on a personal level. Off the bat that meant sharing my lowest lows, but also my highest highs, and right now? I’m at that high, and I want to share it with you. For the past five years, I feel like life has been such a rollercoaster, bouncing up and down from happy to sad, but I finally feel like I’m in a stable position and I can’t lie, it’s refreshing.

When it comes to being in this position when you feel like everything in your life is working like the perfect mechanism, you can’t help but have the fear that it is all going to come crashing down, it is so difficult to shift that thought from your mind. I know right now I’m feeling that. I’m scared that something is going to happen and like before, I’m going to be left alone again, I’m sick of that thought being stuck in my fucking head.

But you know what?

No.

I’m not going to let this fear control me again as it has done in the past. Life is fucking good, and I’m going to ride this wave if it’s the last thing I do. I have no reason to complicate my life with these thoughts, and neither do you.

Although I’m sitting here talking about how great things are right now, the last thing I’m doing is becoming blind to other people and the things they have going on right now. Life is a real bitch, but it’s our bitch (horrible wording oh my lord). You need to make life yours, grab onto it, and mold it into what you want. Do not settle for anything else, your life is just that, YOUR life.

It might be shit right now, it might look like there is no way out of these problems, but please trust me, there is a light at the end of that tunnel, you just got to find that motivation to keep going and find it. It is hard, so fucking hard, but I’m not going to tell you that I hope you find it, I know you are going to find it, I know that you have that motivation. You can literally do fucking anything.

The other day I listened to the voice note I recorded when I gave up. I listened to myself sob down that microphone about how the loneliness was killing me, I said that I accepted that it would never get better than this, and I had no other options. If I could go back now, I would sit that person down and tell him that his fight isn’t over yet, I would tell him that he needs to look past being alone and search for the motivation to improve himself. That person will always be a part of me and I will never forget the lesson he taught me. He taught me that to help others is to help yourself. If he didn’t teach me that, then I wouldn’t be sitting here talking to you wonderful people.

I hope you have a wonderful day.

Never forget,

Don’t Stop.